“I’ll never be a couple-zombie.” I told my friend at work. Geri was reliable for a bit of couple-bashing, given that she was a gorgeously sexy, tiny blonde with a party-girl personality and the looks to match it. She seemed to spend her time skipping from one gorgeous man’s bed to another, without so much as twisting an ankle in those ridiculously high heels of hers. I envied her. Damn my square jaw and big brown hair. If only I’d been born tiny and with a cute pixie face to match…
“Two months?” she scoffed, laying tables. The silver cutlery sat against the perfectly smooth white cloth, glinting in the soft candlelight. She straightened a knife distractedly. “You’re right, they’d have to be fucking crazy to get engaged at that short notice. It won’t last.” she added, with an air of knowledge.
“Too right.” I agreed, glad someone was on my side for once. Most people thought it was cute. “If she does marry him, the poor girl will have wrecked the rest of her life.”
“Divorces are expensive.” she added, just as today’s mother-of-the-bride walked in to see how the room was coming together. She shot us a filthy look, huge hat quivering, and stormed out, almost tripping over her ridiculous lavender dress. What was it about weddings that made people dress ridiculously?
“So are weddings.” I waved an arm to include everything we were doing.
“Unless it’s cheap and tacky.”
“Alright, that’s true.” I accepted. “Though that’s just as bad.”
One of the older waitresses straightened, stretching her back and putting the last of her cutlery in a grey plastic box.
“Finished.” Alice declared, sweeping her short black fringe aside.
“I’ve got ages to go.” I frowned at my own table unhappily, noting the untidy cluster of glasses. I sighed to myself. I hadn’t been paying total attention to the task at hand. Again.
“By the way,” Alice stopped us on her way past, one hand on her hip, the other propping the box against her side, “I got engaged after two months, and we married when we finished university. I have two great kids and I happen to love my husband. It was the best decision of my life.” And with that she strode out, the door slamming shut behind her.
“Oops,” Geri giggled. I slapped a hand over my face.
“Oh god…” I groaned. “Why me?” Me and my big mouth had walked slap bang into it again. “Can I get into much more trouble here?”
“Nope.” Geri replied with an evil glint in her eye. “You did sleep with the chef’s best friend…”
“I meant it rhetorically!” I almost wailed. “Besides, that couldn’t be helped. He was a squaddie, and ripped. …Plus the vodka helped.”
“Sasha Gray, I do declare you are a slut.” Geri laughed, nudging me conspiratorially in the ribs. “Welcome to the club.”
“It’s much more fun than being a couple.”
“And there’s so much fun to be had… I think Alec’ll approve of my new slutty status.” I giggled.
“He’s a cheerleader, right?”
“Then darling, he deals with sluts every day of the week.”